Here's a news headline you'll never see again...

[cbelt3]

Somehow that reminds me of the guy who was coked up the weekend before starting his new job, so he got a sample from his girlfriend. Took it in, he passed the test, and went to work. They called him in the next day to 'talk about his drug test'.

"What ? I passed ! You said so !"
"Yes sir. You passed the drug test. We do an additional test because of potential exposure to teratogens."
"So ?"

"You're Pregnant."