Friday Funnies: Post a joke, gif, funny story

[pRICE cUBE]

Filliam H. Muffman wrote:

Football

[rjmacs]

Filliam H. Muffman wrote:

Obviously it's Crushed Nuts.

[Grumpyguy]

miley-laughing001:miley-laughing001:miley-laughing001:

Rick-o wrote:
A woman stopped by, unannounced, at her son's house. She knocked on the door then immediately walked in.
She was shocked to see her daughter-in-law lying on the couch, totally naked. Soft music was playing, and the aroma of perfume filled the room. "What are you doing?!" she asked.
"I'm waiting for Mike to come home from work," the daughter-in- law answered.
"But you're naked!" the mother-in-law exclaimed.
"This is my love dress," the daughter-in-law explained. "Love dress? But you're naked!"
"Mike loves me and wants me to wear this dress," she explained." It excites him to no end. Every time he sees me in this dress, he instantly becomes romantic and ravages me for hours on end. He can't get enough of me".
The mother-in-law left. When she got home, she undressed, showered, put on her best perfume, dimmed the lights, put on a romantic CD, and lay on the couch, waiting for her husband to arrive.
Finally, her husband came home. He walked in and saw her lying there so provocatively.
"What are you doing?" he asked.
"This is my love dress," she whispered sensually.
"Needs ironing"...

[Grumpyguy]

What's the difference between IRON MAN and IRON WOMAN?

One's a superhero and the other is a statement.

[SteveG]

[DP]

An executive in China on business has sex with a Chinese prostitute and a few days later his member is all black and blue and red and green and he's in immense pain. So he gets home and goes straight to his doctor and the doctor says, "Holy Moly! I've never seen anything so bad! I'l have to amputate to save your life!". Well, the guy goes to three more doctors and the all tell him the same thing. Despondent and in horrible pain, he hits on the solution-"a Chinese prostitute; I'll go see a Chinese doctor!" He finds one and the doctor says, "Have you seen white doctor?" The exec says, "Yes." "And what did white doctor tell you?" "My johnson would need to be amputated". "Oh, no, I don't need to amputate" says the Chinese doctor. "Thank goodness!" cries the exec. "I knew I'd find a solution!" "No", says the doctor, "I don't need to amputate. Three, four days, it''ll fall off all by itself!".

[tenders]

That Chinese joke is from the humor genre known as rottenwankenfallenoffenbitten. It works with any racial or ethnic stereotype, and is enhanced by the adoption of both ridiculous synonyms for “johnson” (never using the same one more than once), and exaggerated accents.

[srf1957]

tenders wrote:
That Chinese joke is from the humor genre known as rottenwankenfallenoffenbitten. It works with any racial or ethnic stereotype, and is enhanced by the adoption of both ridiculous synonyms for “johnson” (never using the same one more than once), and exaggerated accents.

Heard it the first time in 1972 . From a Vietnam vet .