Daughters or Sons (LONG) ?

[Carm]

LOL cbelt3

[jdc]

soooo, this turned out exactly as i would have guessed

50% say girls, 50% say boys

just like:
50% prefer ford, 50% prefer chevy
50% prefer democrats, 50% prefer republicans
and on and on =)

oh and pinion -- DONT find out early

discovering the sex of the baby on her "birth"day was near the MOST exciting thing in my entire life -- equal moments of anticipation, wonder, shock and final joy -- were overwhelming

we found out by "accident" on our second, there wasnt really any of the above emotions...

[sscutchen]

We have a son who is a freshman engineering major at UTexas, and is on the Dean's List.

And we have a daughter who is a junior in high school, is a three year varsity athlete and a National Merit finalist.

Both are wonderful, excellent students, clear headed with strong self-esteem and are very mature.

I know from personal experience what the original poster was describing. I would definitely agree with the original proposition. Girls are MUCH nastier to each other. It starts in about 4th grade and accelerates in about 6th grade, as social status becomes more important and each girl is trying to find her relative place; what clique she ends up in.

What appears to happen is that boys solve their issues by throwing down; getting in each other's faces. Guys are open and clear in their confrontations. After the confrontation, the issue is often forgotten, and the guys can be friends again.

Girls, on the other hand, fight with their brains, which is much more vicious. They attack each other psychologically. They can be superficially nice to each other face to face, and unbelievably nasty to each other behind each other's back. They plan. They plot. They connive. We had a MUCH more difficult time shepherding our daughter through 4th-9th grade than we did our son. Girls are just nasty to each other. Fortunately, we maintained a close relationship with our daughter, and she was open to us with what she was going through. The fact that she was an athlete and was smart gave her social status that helped her deal with the attacks on her ego and self-esteem. Even so, it was often very difficult.

There is lot of truth in the movie Mean Girls.

Guys start to become subject to these attacks as girls and guys start dating seriously. Ask any guy about
how girls say things are fine when they are not,
how they can be obtuse in an argument,
how the guy gets in trouble for stuff he has no clue about,
how girls will crush you if you get in a "list argument..."
how you can never tell why they are mad or happy.

Guys are clueless about this stuff. This is because we have never learned how to confront this way. We tend to be way too literal to confront women in their ring. Against women, we are unarmed.

Which would I prefer? I would prefer my kids. Heh.

My wife is probably closer to my son and me to my daughter... mainly because our senses of humor match that way. My wife and son often think our jokes are stoopid. What do they know?

But we are fortunate. My wife and I have stayed very involved with our kids even as we gave them freedom and opportunity to mature on their own. A very difficult and fine line. We had a lot of bumps and bruises along the way. And through it all we have developed a wonderful family relationship. We are very blessed.

[OWC Jamie]

They both can present unique challenges.

Agree with most of above except the statistically incorrect ignorant remark about both parents at home.

[graylocks]

[quote lafinfil][quote elmo3]As long as there is both a mother and a father in the house, in order to offer up both the male and female perspectives on life, your children--no matter the gender--will be fine, and you won't have any more difficulty with one than the other.
Boy - talk about narrow minded

The only thing left out was that mom is stay at home and bakes cookies all day

What an insult to hard working successful single parents everywhere.
thank you, lafinfil. glad you spoke up. having been raised by a single mom of a boy and a girl i was annoyed by that statement. my mom did a darn good job - her parenting is one of the reason i chose to become a mom. i wanted to pass it on. oh, yeah - i'm a single parent also. since i'm not raising my son under a rock i think his life is filled with a lot of different perspectives.

and as to the original question, i don't know if girls or boys are easier but i think i'm a better mom to a son than i might have been to a daughter. i have constant reminders that "He is NOT me..."

[Racer X]

[quote BigGuynRusty][quote lafinfil]FWIW I have four sisters - one ones her own business while, one worked her own business from home, one has
fluctuated between working full time and freelancing over the last 20 years depending on the kids ages
and the other was a single parent for the first six years of her sons life and married a
guy who divorced an alcoholic wife and raise four kids on his own as a single father
Don't Post Drunk!

BGnR
I resent that, except on Thirsdays and Saturdays.......

[AlphaDog]

I've figured it out!!!!

We're happy with whatever we get and do what we need to parent them.

[kap]

It has been a very interesting read! Thanks everyone for sharing. We are constantly striving to provide the best 'co-parenting'/baby-sitting we possibly can to our lit' cousins, nieces, nephews, etc. and hope that they all will become good-standing adult. If every parent was more conscientious of their substantial influences on their off-springs the world would be a much better place

[Mike V]

Interesting discussion.

My first child is expected in July. It is a boy.

My girlfriend really wanted a girl, and says that "Boys are trouble." Whatever that means.

Also she probably wanted to buy dresses and girl type stuff instead of trucks and boy type stuff.

Personally I didn't care, but was secretly hoping for a girl purely because she wanted a girl.


You definitely can choose the sex of your child.
Down here in Australia, it costs about AUD$15,000 - $20,000 for sex selection.

[lafinfil]

Congratulations Mike

One of my sisters has a son that is a very good match to her personality

My mom told her "He's just like you were at that age"

My sister replied "I am so sorry"

Enjoy & cherish which ever you get.

: - )