When "friends" split a check, advice needed on getting them to fair share

[mrbigstuff]

I do what rj said, works every time. I also differentiate between close friends, casual friends and just people who happen to be at the table with me, and act accordingly.

[NewtonMP2100]

....fair share is good.....if I was the one with the highest income there, and the others made much less and close friends......have no problems paying for everyone......

.....just don't like it when one tries to pull one over by always ordering the most expensive dish/drinks.....

[$tevie]

I think it's completely fair to say, I'm all for splitting the food bill four ways, but I'd like to opt out on the alcohol portion since I didn't have any.

Many years ago a group of us took a friend out for his birthday dinner. One member of our party had a lot of money and little sense. He ordered three $60 (back when $60 was $60) bottles of wine for the table. And incidentally, got drunk and had to go sleep in his car while we ate dinner. When the check came, it was enormous (this was an expensive restaurant to begin with) and our friend who did not drink said, "Okay that's it. I've paid into your drink bills for years but this is where I draw the line." It ended up with the wife covering all of the wine and it worked out okay with no hurt feelings, thank goodness.

Long story short, best to get this straightened out now before such a dire case comes up.

[SteveG]

bobinmurphy wrote:
Why not just speak up and tell them you'd prefer paying your own bill since you didn't drink?

Because they are probably drunk and will punch you out.

[davester]

I usually do what rjmacs and mrbigstuff suggested. I'm also of the opinion that getting bent out of shape over what is typically $10 or less is not worth losing sleep (or friends) over.

[Janit]

It has just occurred to me that a good retort I could make to the guy who eats 4x as much and makes 4x as much would be, "Sure, I'll pay for your steak dinner if it means that you will provide me with some "extra value" afterwards. It might embarrass him enough in front of the others.

On the other hand, he might try to take it seriously.