I want just two things for Christmas...

[voodoopenguin]

...so where can I find them?

1) I believe that there is a way to focus sound to a small specific area. I want a handheld machine I can point to the inside of cars that cruise slowly through built-up areas with those very loud pounding bass notes thumping away which annoys everyone else around. I wish to focus exceedingly loud classicalmusic, nursery rhymes or 1960s bubblegum pop inside the car so only they hear it.

2) I believe there is also a device which obliterates any cell phone signal within a given range around it. Something I can use in theatres, churches, quiet walks in the woods when idiots think that everyone in a 50 foot radius would be interested in their conversation.

Yes, my middle name is Humbug.

[space-time]

if you find those, let me know too.

[rgG]

When you find them, post a link as I think they will be brisk sellers.

I personally would like a device that would mute (for me) all the people talking overly loud about their sister-in-law's hysterectomy/hemroid surgery/cyst removal-you get the drift- on their cell phones while in the check-out lanes. Way too much information and about people I don't even know.

[Zoidberg]

In college, I worked up a sketch for a "bass seeking missile", but no one seemed interested. I'm now in a rural area where it's not so prevalent. In New Orleans, it was very prevalent. You couldn't pull up to a red light without at least three cars thumping -- and each something different.

The phone thing was why I stopped going to the movies back home. Again, in a more rural environment, not so bad. But I can remember going to the premier of a movie and there were maybe half a dozen people on their phones -- and many were text messaging from the looks of it. Annoying.

I guess I'm a humbug too.

[davemchine]

I stopped going to theater's due to the problems mentioned above. I recently took my 6 year old to see a theatrical performance of scrooge and experienced the same thing at $20/ticket! Next time I'll spring for the gold circle.

I'd also like that sound device. I drive a convertible and am careful not to play my music loud but I consistently end up next to someone thumping away with their stereo. I'd vote for sound nazi laws if it were an option.

Dave

[Buzz]

I'm all for the de-thumping routine, but rather than a cell phone muter, I'd rather see another pointable device that intercepts cell conversations, and broadcasts them through the venue's audio system... maybe not so good for a walk in the woods, but theaters, churches, supermarkets, classrooms, restaurants, etc. would be excellent utilization.

[blooz]

not good enough for me. I want a ray gun that turns their stereo systems into masses of molten metal.

[SteveJobs]

http://science.howstuffworks.com/pain-beam.htm

[Carm]

http://www.newhousenews.com/archive/story1a092200.html Good Reading.
http://www.globalgadgetuk.com/Personal.htm Jammer
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cell_phone_jammer wiki

Carm

[Racer X]

#2 really exists. They are commercially available outside the US. However, in the US...

"The FCC has fielded enough queries about the legality of cell phone jammers that it issued a notice last year. In it, the agency warns that jammers violate federal laws that broadly prohibit interfering with licensed radio spectrum. Owning, manufacturing, marketing, offering for sale or operating a cell phone jammer is punishable by an $11,000 fine and up to a year in prison for each offense, the notice states."

That quote is from a 2000 article

I do believe that vomiting on an obnoxious cell phone user is still allowed, as there are no vomiting ordinances on record. Spitting and urinating limitations, yes, vomiting, no.